27 times an hour

I guess that is what Fibromyalgia looks like. My sleep study shows I "wake" 27 times an hour. About every two minutes! Of course I don't know I wake up that often, because it isn't a you pop up and look around and check the clock type of waking. Just the type that keeps one from hitting a sleep cycle. So I never hit the true "REM" sleep that is required. So where does one go from there? Good question! The sleep specialist said since I don't have sleep apnea (umm, I told him that!), well he can't help me. It is a pain issue (told him that also). So now I have to try to get my Primary care doctor to send me to a pain specialist. My therapist sent me to a doctor who sent me to this doctor, but it has to be my primary who sends me to a pain specialist. He doesn't believe in Fibro. Hopefully he believes in sleep studies that show one doesn't sleep! That night of sleep study was AFTER two sleeping pills! My first sleep study, I didn't take them, and slept less than one hour all night, so the study was no good. One has to sleep at least 2.5 hours in a 6 hour study to make the results "good". Wondering how I hit that waking so often lol. So I could use your prayers. Prayers that after yet another doctor, I begin to find some end to my suffering. Pain, lack of sleep, depression and PTSD are a horrible combination! I really have to wonder if they are all tied together. But no one can say for sure. In the meantime, I have yet another prescription. I hate that, I have lost count of how many that makes. My dream right now is to be able to find a doctor who can get down my number of medications. I mentioned it to my Pharmacist today. Even he agreed that I was on a lot, perhaps to many. I feel for him keeping watch on the cocktail, though he does a good job of it. I love my little mom and pop pharmacy. Something to be said for when they know you when you drive in and bring your meds without asking your name. And when you can say "can I ask you about suchandsuch med?" and he says, sure but you have had it for awhile. I am beginning to think my Pharmacist is more important than my doctors, because he keeps track of my doctors!

The Shunning and GCB, Simple living

We watched The Shunning at church tonight for our evening service. They are trying to do a movie night once a month. It was a good movie. I did loose a few tears. I didn't love the ending. But in the end there were some good things.

There are a lot of Amish in this area. I have learned a lot about them. I love their love for God. And unlike many, I understand why they try so hard to protect their children from "The English". Many things we have, such as TV can bring sin into the home. In fact, many of the things in our lives are pushing us away from God. The newest TV show for one. GCB. Good Christian Bit****. Really? Do we need yet another TV show making a mockery of Christianity? Making a mockery of wives and husbands fulfilling their roles as God intended? We have given up cable, but this is a network show. One that will not been watched in my house. NOTHING that makes a mockery of God will be seen in my house.

I am not saying I would find the Amish life easy. I am sure I wouldn't. But I think I may find it easier than being judged by the GCB women I know and live around! My last job was testament to that! A bunch of people who want to say they are "Christian" who want to mock people who live a Christian life. That my friends is the story of GCB. Those are the women that judge us! They turn up their noses at those of us who choose to live more simple lives, because they KNOW we are leading by example. GOD'S example!

In the movie, the Amish girl went into town. Everyone stared and snickered. She felt good when she for a few minutes tried their lives. In the end, well I won't give it away but a very wise grandmother helped her sort it out.

In the end, my grandmother had it right. "Buy, Buy, Buy". "Why does everyone need to Buy, Buy, Buy?". She asked. I didn't understand what she meant at the time. I was young enough not to get it. I do get it now. So many people think if I buy this or that, I will be happy. If I buy my children this or that, they will be happy. But that is so far from the truth!

A more simple life, buying less things. "Having to have" less things, I think that is happier! I have been trying it the last few years.

NO, I am not amish, nor will I ever be. But I try to take lessons from them. They work hard, far harder than most of us "Englishers". They have far less "free" time. Than most of us. Just as my daughter has less "free time" than some children her age. But do her schoolmates really have "free time"? I say that although she washes and hangs her own laundry, and has some other chores, she has more "free time". She isn't expected to go to practice for three or four sports a week, and the games or such that go along with it. She doesn't spend hours in the car each week getting to all those things. Her extra curricular things are manageable. One at a time. Right now, it is math club.

No, I have not watched GCB and I promise not to. I promise never to watch what I have been told makes a mockery of my God. I promise to continue raising my daughter in such a way she still has time for God, that she knows he is KING! That, is the love of a mother!

Want to do a swap?

I joined a swap on another blog. It is an apron swap. I love aprons!!! I thought I would also do one here! Just reply to this post. Give me your email addy, but spell out the dot com part. That way spammers hopefully can't get it so easy. All you have to do is be willing to make an apron to send, and get one in return! Other than that, there are no rules. You can use materials you have on hand, buy a couple yards of new material, re purpose materials (such as a skirt), but it should be a full apron with a bib and skirt. If we have a good swap, I will do another soon!!!!

I am sad

I may have to go to Kansas and help take care of MIL and FIL. The part that makes me sad, is that they are not my parents. They are my Ex husbands parents. How is it that your mother took care of you your whole life and you can't take care of her? I understand in some ways that he didn't care so much for his step-dad, but he helped raise him for a few years.

Knowing that Fil broke his hip and has pins and the day he came home MIL broke her leg in two places I would think that their children would be there for them. One seems to be mostly. The other not at all. I had to tell Beloved that I may have to leave to help them. I am so happy he gave me his blessing. I hope I don't have to go. Erica needs me here. With Beloved being gone trucking and Zach in and out. But if push comes to shove, Zach will have to step up and help out some with his sister. I can't bear to think they won't be taken care of.

I am not sure what to expect from here, if I have to go help them. I have never been in this situation before. But I will go if needed. I dread the drive more than anything. I have made the drive before of course, but not alone. Right now, I am just trying to prepare and hoping for the best, planning for the worst.

The new chore system, wonderful new friends and other musings!

First of all, I promised to update on our new chore system. So far it is working very well, and I decided to add menu plans to it. That also is a work in progress. I decided to take yet more note cards, and write the things we eat on them. Each week, I can pull those cards and place them in my daily tabs and make my menu and shopping list that way. I think it will really help me out. I was making monthly menus, but then Beloved got his trucking job and it is just hard to plan monthly now. But I can usually start on Sunday and have some idea of how the week will look. So I am tweeking this system to try to add this! I hope it works and will let you know!

I had a wonderful email today from a new reader! I always enjoy hearing from my readers, and love new friends. I feel like I really made a new friend today! The conservative Christian lifestyle is not a popular one, and it always feels great to know that you have friends on your side.

I finished a walker caddy today for my Ex FIL. He doesn't know I am sending it, but since his accident and hip surgery he is on a walker and can use it. I am glad I kept the pattern I made when I made one for my neighbor! The sad part about it is that when his wife brought him home, she was getting him settled and fell and broke her leg in two places. She is set to leave the hospital soon after surgery, but will have to go to a rehab center since she can't care for herself yet, and her Beloved sure can't do it after his hip surgery. I hate being so far away and not being able to help more. All I can really do right now, is send flowers, cards, handmade gifts and pray. That is the hard part. I want to be there to really help. FIL does have family nearby who is helping him daily, and loving people bringing him meals. I still wish I could be there. If I could get away right now, I would go visit. But on the other hand they would want to have things perfect for me and that would not be the point. The point would be me making things perfect for them. But I really can't get away right now anyway. I really need to be here for my family and be taking care of my own medical stuff. Beloved has asked me to see this through. And I intend to do it. So if you could, would you send my MIL and FIL prayers?

Beloved has had an odd week this week. I hope to have him home an extra day this weekend. However it is trucking, so we won't count on it. We thought he would be home two days last weekend. Turned out he was home less than 24 hours. Sometimes, getting home early doesn't always pay off. And apparently either does having a reputation for always being on time! He seems to be in high demand since he always has his loads delivered early, and has only been late when it was not in his control (truck breakdowns) and even then he wasn't so late that it probably mattered. I am proud of him for that. But on the other side, his phone is always ringing! I am so glad that he deals with all calls on his cell and I never have to answer it! He gets calls from Brokers and Dispatch and many times a day. I am so glad his cell is 100% tax deductible (because it is used 100% for his job). It seems that when he is home we can't get a full nights sleep due to someone with his job calling. Tonight, he couldn't get one station on his TV! That was odd. He does have an indoor antenna, but he always gets plenty of stations. Here at home, he gets almost as many as we do with the one up in the air. But tonight he is in the boonies. So he is listening to his satellite radio instead. I am so glad I got him that for Christmas!

Have you voted? Fibromyagia and sleep!

We vote here in Ohio Tuesday. Some people don't think that the primary vote is important, but it is. The primary is where we choose who will be in the end vote. If we do not vote for the primary, we have no choice in who will be in the final running. It is important. I will not say who I am voting for, because I don't want to say who I think you should be voting for. But please vote! It is the Christian vote that will save our nation! It will save our values! PLEASE VOTE!!!!



On another note, my last sleep study went well! I took my sleep aids and slept most of the night. I woke during my REM sleep. They didn't like that, but I think I always wake during my REM sleep. I hit it about the time I am due to wake DD up for school. DD gets herself ready, but I have to make sure she is up. That is my job as mom. But my bio clock says that is the time to sleep lol! I still have to go back for an appt. to see what my sleep study said. I don't think that it will solve my issues. It may be an aid to help. They were looking for certain things such as sleep apnea. I don't think I have that. But if they can rule that out, perhaps we can move on to see what the issue really is. Fibro is a touchy subject. Pain is not widely accepted as a reason to not sleep. Even when that is the reason. Even with sleep aids, they don't overrule pain and doctors need to come to understand that! Perhaps with sleep tests over and over again they will get it.

Prayers for tornado victims

I live not far from the Ohio tornadoes. I am asking for prayers for all the victims. They had told us for two days before this was coming. So I am glad we had plenty of warning. It wasn't that bad in my direct area. But just to the south of us was a lot of destruction. Also praying for the families of the students in Norther Ohio where the school shooting was. A natural disaster is bad, but when it is an intentional act, it is that much more devastating.